• missporkpie@gmail.com
  • Great Malvern, England
4 Ways to Protect Your Children in a Divorce

4 Ways to Protect Your Children in a Divorce

There are many complicated decisions and conversations to be had regarding divorce. Parents need to decide on custody, visitation, and child support, but they also need to consider how a divorce will affect their children. Even from the moment you file for divorce, you should take steps to protect your children from harm. Working through the end of a marriage is painful for anyone. But when it comes to protecting your children from the fallout of that breakup, you need to put your feelings aside and think about what’s best for them..

Communicate with Your Children About the Divorce

Communication is vital in any relationship, but it’s all the more critical during a divorce. You and your spouse will have many difficult conversations, but you also need open and honest communication with your children. You don’t want your kids to be in the dark about what’s happening. They need to know that their lives will change due to the divorce but that you and their other parent are committed to keeping them happy and healthy. When it comes to communicating with your children, there are many strategies you can employ. You can have regular family meetings and discuss how the divorce impacts your family. 

Image credit

Don’t expose your children to conflict and fighting.

You can protect your children from witnessing conflict and fighting between you and your spouse. Try to keep conversations between you and your spouse at a child-appropriate level. And have a plan in place for handling times when emotions run high. You can also encourage your spouse to do the same. Whether it’s taking a walk or heading to a nearby coffee shop, or having a designated area in your house where you can go to avoid conflict, you should have a plan for de-escalating heated conversations. Try to keep your disagreements away from your children when emotions are running high. This means not having conversations in front of them and making an effort to avoid bringing your feelings for your spouse into contact with them.

Make sure child support is included in your divorce agreement.

If possible, make sure that the terms of your divorce agreement include the amount and regular payment of child support. If you and your spouse can work this out on your own, that’s great. If not, the court will step in to decide what’s fair. If you’re in the middle of a divorce, it’s essential to consider the standard of living your child is currently used to. You don’t want them to suffer because of your divorce. With that in mind, it’s best to have a solicitor help you negotiate an appropriate child support amount. Make sure you have the final divorce agreement in writing and that it has the child support amount included.

Establish a safety net for your children

Divorce is a difficult transition for anyone. For your children, it’s even more difficult. They may struggle with self-esteem and confidence, especially if your divorce was acrimonious. They may also struggle to make friends and find a sense of belonging. You can help your children get through the divorce by establishing a safety net. A safety net provides support for the transitions your children are about to go through. It can be a therapist your kids can talk to, an after-school program they can attend, or even an allowance that gives them some financial freedom. Whatever safety net you create needs to be relevant to the changes your children are experiencing. A safety net specific to your family’s situation will help your kids get through the divorce easier.

Join the discussion!