Category: Blogger

How To Deal With A Frightened Child

Today I had to deal with one of the worst things a parent can see their child go through; fear.

Dinky had an ophthalmology appointment today and although this isn’t the first time he has been to have his eyes checked, he was not happy during the whole car journey there. My Dad took us, and normally when he’s around all he can do is talk and blabber on about nothing. But today he was silent, with the odd sigh and whimper. He told us that he was bored, so we kept chatting to him to keep him occupied.

Fast forward thirty minutes into the car journey and he lets out an almighty cry, followed by projectile vomiting and hyperventilating. Luckily we were close to the hospital so we parked up and cleaned everything up. I took Dinky into the ophthalmology department to get him checked in and that’s when he confessed that he was frightened about his appointment.

Now, I could have gone about this statement in one of two ways:

  • Shrug off his fear and take him in knowing there’s nothing to be frightened of
  • Let him explain why he was frightened and then comfort his fears and encourage him that Mummy is with him and that I wouldn’t let anything happen to him

I, of course, opted for the second option. Just because I knew that he would be absolutely fine, it doesn’t mean that the fear in his head was irrelevant or untrue. He felt scared and the last thing he needed was for his fear to be shrugged off or dismissed.

When I’m feeling anxious, nobody can understand why. Not even me and that can be so frustrating for all parties involved. I can honestly say I appreciate the company of someone who doesn’t dismiss me much more than someone saying “you’ll be fine.”

 

 

This made me think about how we sometimes treat children and their fears. Why should their fears be dismissed? They are feeling scared and what they need is someone to explain things to them not just saying “oh stop being silly.”

The next time your child reacts to something unusual compared to normal, consider the fact that they might be frightened. Take the time to listen to their fears and let them know that it’s okay to feel that way sometimes, but you will be there through everything. For example, if they are scared of a monster under the bed, empathise with them, show them nothing is there and also let them know that if they need you, you will be straight in to make everything better.

Every child is different, but today really opened my eyes with Dinky and his fears. I know how he feels because I’ve felt like that before, and even though everyone told me I’d be fine, it would have been nice if I had the chance to explain why I felt so scared.

#SpeakUp #MentalHealthAwareness #NeverAlone #Autism

 

How To Maintain A Positive Outlook On Life

Sometimes, without even realizing it, we can become very negative in terms of the way we think and the way we see things. It’s so easy to become cynical about the world when all we seem to see on the news is constant injustice and tragedy, all while we may be dealing with our own pain and heartache. But negativity will prevent you from being able to truly enjoy your own life, because it will just be that dark cloud that is hanging heavy above your head, and you don’t want that do you?

All you need to do is make small adjustments in your life, and you can turn the environment you’re living in into a happier place for your mind.

Here’s how to do that.

Reframe your challenges.

It’s important to tell yourself that you can never get stuck. There are no dead ends when it comes to challenges that you will face in your life – only redirections. Sometimes there are things that we just can’t control, no matter how much we may try, and the sooner you can accept that the sooner you can let go and be at peace with it. Do not let uncontrollable happenings drive you mad – its life, things happen. Instead, think about the things that we can control, like our smiles, our communication, our social skills, and our relationships with others.

Exercise is the only drug.   

Exercise is a wonderful way to keep a positive mind, even if you don’t feel like it at the time. This is because it triggers the release all of the happy chemicals like endorphins, that generally make you feel good, even euphoric at times. A Pilates workout is a very fun thing to do that not only keeps you nice and fit, but allows your mind to be cleared from any troubles, and focuses on finding your calm and happy place that everyone needs to visit sometimes.

Keep a gratitude journal.

You may think this sounds rather silly, but sometimes an event or experience will happen that can completely ruin your whole day, and this means even if something good happened earlier, the bad is always a lot better at overshadowing. So knowing that our minds tend to hold onto the negative, we can intentionally focus on the positive instead. You can do this by writing down at least three things that you feel truly grateful for every single day. You will soon see how your attitude starts to change because you’re deliberately forcing yourself to focus on the good.

Get good at being rejected.

Being rejected is horrible, it makes you feel like crap, and you won’t want to put yourself out there ever again. But, little did you know, that rejection is actually a skill. It’s not easy to fail the job that you were going for, or get broken up with on your birthday (yes, it happens!). Only the strong and talented can deal with it, which is you. So rather than letting it put you down – embrace it as an unidentified challenge that will soon come in handy one day in the future.

Birthday Gift Wishlist For A Soon To Be 6 Year Old

This post contains affiliate links. If you follow my links and purchase anything, I will receive a small commission for the sale ♥

 

I can’t believe my Dinky is not so small anymore! With his sixth birthday approaching, I have started to think about what to get him for his birthday. It’s not until December, but with Christmas to think about then too, I like to get his birthday gifts in nice and early so I’m not rushing around.

Being a Mum of one, I always struggle to find gifts for Dinky because I’m never sure on what to get for boys, so some of these ideas might be out there. If you’re struggling for ideas for your little one, hopefully, this wishlist will help give you some ideas on birthday gifts for your little ones too (or dare I say it, Christmas!)

  • Marvel always goes down a treat for little boys. The idea of being a superhero is super exciting. Why not consider getting them a fancy dress costume for them to race around in pretending they are their favourite superhero? You can grab one from this link here!

Official Marvel licensed Captain America fancy dress costume 5-6 years with Shield & Mask, Made for George Collection

  • Dinky loves colouring, drawing and writing at the moment. I struggle to get him out of his bedroom because he’s always drawing me something new, or writing an invitation for me to come to his “party.” If your child is the same, or they simply need new pens and pencils, grab them one of these large sets so they can carry on creating!

Artworx 125 Piece Art Studio With Aluminium Case – Purple

  • One thing that I’ve been meaning to get for Dinky for some time, is a sensory light for his bedroom. He absolutely loves the one that me and Mr. Pie have in our bedroom, but unfortunately, it get’s quite warm so I wouldn’t want that in his bedroom. I came across this sensory light and I think it would be perfect for a birthday gift this year!

LED Colour Changing Rocket Light Tube with Remote 100cm By Playlearn

  • Dinky is obsessed with having a “den” at the moment. Everywhere we are he wants me to create a den out of something. I think it provides him with a place to calm down if he is feeling particularly anxious. He also likes to play and pretend it’s his house with a kitchen and makes me food. I think getting him a mid sleeper bed with a den underneath would provide the perfect space for his bedroom for him to tuck himself away and play. Also, he needs a new bed so I’d be killing two birds with one stone here!

Cabin Bed Mid Sleeper Pine Bunk with Tent Blue 5758WG-BLUE

  • Another thing that Dinky loves is cars. He’s at his happiest when talking about, playing with, being driven around, or even playing on our PS4 on Need For Speed. I’ve come across this handy little case full of cars that will provide storage for them too! Not that I expect the cars to go back in the case(!)

CrazySell Plastic Dustproof Toy Cars Parking Storage with Track Plastic Box Divider Organizer – Color Randomly

Some of these gifts I may not buy for him for his birthday, they might have to wait until Christmas! I plan on adding to this list as time goes on! I hope it has given you some inspiration for any gifts you may have to buy in the near future!

Project Improve Myself: Week One

I’m on a major self-help mission at the moment. As you may have read in my last post, I’ve not been feeling too good about myself lately and I need to make a change in my day to day life. I’ve decided to not only improve my health but to improve all other aspects of my life too so that I can feel happier on the whole. I thought I’d document the change(s) that I’m going to be making so that if anyone else wants to join in and improve themselves, then they can.

Chalk, Writing, Success, Business, Strategy

Sunday

Sunday is the day that I get Dinky back from his Dad’s, and it’s the best day of the week for me because we get to spend the whole day relaxing and being ourselves. The change that I’m going to implement today is that I’m going to blitz our home and make it super clean for the new week that begins tomorrow. This way we can get up on Mondays to a freshly cleaned home, and it will make the transition from Sunday into Monday that little bit easier on us all.

The next thing that I need to do today is to go and do the weekly shop. We’re all making a conscious effort to buy healthier foods now, so I’m going to step it up a notch and buy completely healthy food so that we’ve all got no choice but to eat healthier. This week I’ve not been feeling too well. I’ve had a headache behind my eyes for the majority of the week, and I’m certain that it’s stress. However, crappy food and drink wouldn’t have helped the situation either. I’m tired of feeling sluggish and want to make the change now.

Monday-Thursday

Back to the routine of work and school runs from Monday, and I’m going to make the effort to stop being so lazy and actually walk the school run to get Dinky from school. We live close to the top of a hilly town, and Dinky’s school is at the bottom. I can’t think of a better way to get our heart rates up than marching up and down the hill each day.

Since I’ve become self-employed, I’ve been constantly looking at ways to improve my standard of work, and I’m always looking at new opportunities for me to take on. This week I’ve got a few things lined up that I’ve never done before, so I’m feeling optimistic at the idea of a change in my workload too.

Dinky goes to his Dad’s every Thursday afternoon, so the school run won’t be applicable on Friday but I do tend to pile a lot of work onto myself on a Friday when I’ve got the chance to work without any distractions.

 

Fruit, Splash, Fresh, Liquid, Water, Nature, Drop

Eating

As I mentioned earlier, I’ve got a large food shop to do today and I’m going to make it so that we’re only eating healthy food. I’m going to start planning our meals for the week and precooking as much as I can to make it easier to stick to a healthier lifestyle.

On the menu tonight is going to be a grilled chicken and couscous medley, with a light garlic dressing and salad. It’s super easy to throw together, and it’s really low in calories and fat. It’s also one of those meals that you can precook, and warm through when you’re ready to eat. Perfect for Mr Pie’s random work schedules.

Admittedly I’ve not planned meals for the rest of the week yet, but once I’ve got the food in I’m going to sit down and write a meal plan out, pin it to the fridge and stick to it.

I’d love to get some tips and tricks on how I can continue making changes for the better in our lifestyle. Has anyone else ever had enough and started making changes? What did you do to successfully change your lives? Get in touch below!

 

Much love xx

Autumn Health Habits You Should Be Forming

After a lovely summer of holidays, hanging out with friends and enjoying some quality time outdoors, it’s time to refocus on your health. Autumn is a great time to give your mental and physical health a boost, ready in time for winter. To help you get started, here’s a rundown of some top autumn health habits you should be forming.
Eating a balanced diet

It’s easy to let your diet summer between holidays and days out picnicking in the sun. Autumn is the best time to recover and get back into the habit of making nice, home-cooked meals packed with nutrients. Soups, stews and casseroles make nice hearty dishes that can bulk-prepared and feature plenty of vegetables to help you get those vitamins and antioxidants. Take a look at some tasty autumn recipes and start eating right this season.

Get exercising outdoors

Just because the weather’s chillier, there’s no reason why you can’t enjoy a bit of outdoor exercise to get your blood pumping and help you stay fit. Walking is a great exercise to enjoy during the autumn months, and you can get some great cross country walking tips to make sure you’ve got all the essentials prepared. Outdoor classes or cycling are other popular ways to get fit, while autumn is a great time of year to take up running as the conditions are optimal for avoiding heatstroke or dehydration.

Give your skin a detox

A summer spent in the sun can cause problems for your skin. Being exposed to UV rays, sunburn and a lack of moisture can all leave your skin looking dull and tired – which is why an autumn detox is essential. You’ll find some great tips for detoxing your skin online, including recommendations for products to use. Make sure that you use a detoxing clay face mask once a week to help your skin recover from damage and restore your skin to glowing health. A good moisturiser will also help to ward off dry skin during the colder weather to make sure it stays hydrated and soft.

Get a good night’s sleep 

Sleep is one of the most important lifestyle elements for you to care about, and you should be aiming to get at least 8 hours a day. It can be tricky to establish a good sleep routine after a summer spent enjoying lie ins and late nights, but it’s important for your health that you try. Try to avoid electronics an hour before bed and if you can, do a bit of yoga before you sleep. This will help to calm your mind and prepare your body to snooze and leave you feeling great. 
While it’s important to take care of your health all year round, autumn can be a good time to get back on track.Taking care of yourself now could help you to ward off pesky colds and viruses and keep your health in check through the winter.A hectic summer can leave you feeling tired and sluggish, but forming some nice healthy habits will help you feel re-energised and ready for the months ahead.

Detox Tea – Te Divinia – Day Five Review

I’m already on day five of my review of Te Devinia’s detox tea! This week has gone so quickly!

So, let me update you on what’s been going on. In my last article, I mentioned about a flush that you should expect when you’re taking the detox tea, which basically flushes all of the horrible toxins and crap out of your colon. I also mentioned that I hadn’t had one yet, and then once my article was published, guess who had a flush?

It doesn’t hurt at all it just kind of happens, and I’ve got to admit I have felt even less bloated since it happened!

What about food?

I have been trying my best to eat as healthy as possible all week. There have been some minor slip ups, but I feel like I’m eating better than I was before, especially since my flush.

I am going to continue eating healthily even after this review has ended because I feel like I’ve been experimenting more in the kitchen, and I’m sure Mr. Pie has loved not having to cook!

I’ve now got two days left of the review, and I think I might even have some tea leftover as well so I will keep using it after the weigh in day.

Check back on Monday for my results!

 

I Don’t Want The School Holidays To End!

Not long until the kids are back to school! I can literally hear the sigh of relief from a lot of you!

I’ve got to admit, I have loved every second of the summer holidays with Dinky, he’s really come into himself as a character and his behavior has improved massively.

Before the summer holidays, I was struggling with his behavior because he was very much chatting me back, doing everything opposite to what I had asked and in general, being a little pain in the bum.



So what changed?

Once the summer holidays started, I decided to start this trust routine with him. Before, whenever I left the room I’d have to drag him with me because I’d be worried about him trashing the place or messing around with Mr. Pie’s gaming consoles. I decided to give him the option to show me that I can trust him, and he prevailed wonderfully. So, from then on I was introducing new ways of parenting him and he’s taken so well to it. He used to really freak out if something broke or he knew he had done something wrong, but now he calmly tells me what’s happened and we resolve it together.

He used to interrupt if I was talking to anybody but him, but now he will patiently wait by my side and lightly tap my shoulder. Little things like that have totally improved and I’m so proud of the little person that he is becoming.

So, he’s about to start year one at school, and that’s something I’m quite anxious about because of how much going to reception upset him at first. He’s now used to his routine there, and learning through play seems to work out really well for him. I know that going into year one there will be more ‘work’ as such, and I hope he settles into that as well as he has done with learning through play.

Also, I think part of me wants to keep my baby boy at home and enjoy this amazing behavior he has adopted for a little longer, before the attitudes he picks up from school come back!

How many of you don’t want the school holidays to end? What year will your little one be going into?

The Benefits of being a Blogger

Today I took full advantage of being a blogger and able to work wherever I want and spent the day with my friend so that we could catch up. (In between her doing housework and getting her youngest from nursery I was able to work from the comfort of her sofa!).

We decided to fill her paddling pool up for the kids to go in after school and cool off, and to treat them all to a takeaway pizza and chips.

I’ve not felt so relaxed in ages, I really enjoyed watching Dinky play with her children. His confidence has come on so much. When my friend and I first met he would be too anxious to join in with their games and would nervously be tugging on me to either go home or for me to have to be by his side.

But today, he proved how much he has come along by happily joining in with their play and literally only coming to me for food and drinks. As you can see, they had a great time!


Nothing makes me happier than seeing a Dinky enjoying himself. For years we really struggled with his interaction and now he seems to have conquered that. I’m one happy Mumma indeed.

So, to sum up my day, I managed to:
1. Catch up with a great friend of mine.

2. Enjoy watching Dinky play and interact with other children.

3. Work from where and when I felt like it.

I’m totally getting used to this whole being your own boss thing!

How can you become a full-time blogger?

If you want to know how you can be your own boss, check out my post here on How to become a full-time blogger. I’ve also got a great giveaway ending 30/06 there too, so head over and enter!

Just because depression isn’t visible, doesn’t mean it’s not there.

Depression is something that the majority of us will suffer with at some point in our lives. Whether we realize it or not. It comes in different ways for all of us. Some of us just think we’re feeling a little low. Some of us feel like life isn’t worth living anymore.

My experience.

When I first went in about my mental health, the Doctor wasn’t sure whether I was confusing depression with anxiety. Now I look back on it, maybe at the time I was, but I’ve definitely had an element of depression.

I battled for a very long time with my mental health, and I was stubborn enough to not accept the help and let the Doctor prescribe me medication. I was scared I’d be on it for life and become addicted.

A colleague of mine at the time managed to convince me to try it because I’d got to the point where I was nervous about even answering the phone. I was pushing everyone that cares about me away by not talking about my feelings because I felt like it’d just be a burden on them. They did everything I did, worked hard, looked after the children etc. So why couldn’t I do that?

My plan of action.

I finally took the plunge and went to the Doctor asking for medication. I was already on propranolol for my anxiety but that didn’t touch my mood. When I finally gave in I just sat there and sobbed, rambling onto the Doctor about everything that’s built up for me. I felt stupid. So many people in the world are going through so much worse than I am.

I did, however, feel better for just letting it out. The Doctor prescribed me a low dose of sertraline, as what I was feeling clearly wasn’t just my anxiety.

I went back after 2 weeks for a review of my mood. To be honest, in that short space of time I didn’t really see an improvement, apart from the fact that it had helped my anxiety issues slightly!

Within a month of that, I felt like a totally new person. I was no longer crying every day or breaking down over the smallest of things. My patience had improved when it comes to Dinky and his challenging behaviors. Most importantly, I was actually able to smile again.

How do I get a diagnosis for depression?

It’s not something that the Doctor will just diagnose straight away, especially if you’ve not had any past history of mental health. The Doctor will likely prescribe you some antidepressants and ask you come back after a few weeks to check your mood. The Doctor may even refer you to see a mental health worker if you really don’t want to take medication for your depression.

I’m not saying medication is the way forward to cure depression because it isn’t the case for some people. I’m just saying it helped me and still is. I hope to come off of my medication soon.

If you feel like you may be suffering from depression, please go and see your Doctor. It doesn’t mean you’re weak. In fact, it means the opposite. You’ve got the strength to go and tell someone that actually, you’re really not doing okay and need some help. There is nothing wrong with that. Just because depression isn’t visible, it doesn’t mean it isn’t there.

Useful links

Here are some links to find out more about depression, take a mood test, and how you can get the best help for you.

Moodzone

NHS Choices

How To Cope With Anxiety

Please remember that you’re never alone in this. I believe that you can get through this.

Are you one of the FEW? Female Entrepreneur Week

I am super proud to be taking part in this year’s Female Entrepreneur Week (FEW).

I’m going to tell you a little bit about what FEW is, and how you can get involved!

My Story

Not so long ago I was working 34 hours in a Doctors surgery as a medical administrator. The money was fabulous, my colleagues were lovely but I had a problem. Childcare was really hard to find when it came to half-term and summer holidays. I asked my bosses if I could reduce my hours and unfortunately they couldn’t offer me that position. So I had a decision to make. Do I find another job that can work around the school terms, or do I make the leap and become self-employed?

I’ve been blogging now for around three years, and most recently I’ve been enjoying it more and more, building up my network, writing my posts and actually beginning to earn money from blogging. I thought long and hard about the decision I needed to make. Would I want to be stuck in another job that ultimately could get me into the same position that I was already in? Absolutely not.

Do I want a job where I can choose my own hours, write about what I love and still manage to be at home for Dinky? Of course!

There was my answer right there. I handed in my months notice and that month flew by. The 5th of June arrived and I was now self-employed. It was a scary thought but I got right to it by applying to tons of writing work, some being freelance writing through Upwork, and some were writing for my blog.

So what have I achieved so far?

What an absolutely fabulous surprise I’ve had! In just over a week I’ve managed to land myself a column on Soapbox, I’m now writing regularly for two clients on Upwork, and I’ve been given this amazing opportunity to spread the word for Female Entrepreneur Week!

Of course, I would love to take on more work, and I’m still applying every day, but I think in one week, to have made this much progress isn’t bad at all!

If you’re interested in starting your own blog, check out my post – How you can give up your 9-5 and become and full-time blogger – I also have a fabulous giveaway for bloggers there too!

A few special shout outs

I wouldn’t have been able to make this leap if a few people hadn’t either pushed me to do it or given me tons of inspiration on the way.

Zara from Mojo Blogs – this woman has been my absolute rock through all of this. We’ve been friends for almost 6 years (!) now, we’ve met up a few times and had a brilliant day every time. She has been dealing with my crazy panicked texts, giving me advice, tips on how to improve certain aspects of my blog and in general just being an absolutely fabulous friend. Love love xx

Rachel from Coffee, Cake, Kids – I was lucky enough to meet this lovely lady at Blog Camp 2015 and since then she’s helped me build my blog by passing on my name to potential clients, reading my blog and giving me support. Thank you xx

Katie from The Perfect Juggler – I’ve only recently met Katie, but we’re at the same level with our blogs. Her blog is lovely and she’s given me support since starting this journey. We seem to have tons in common and I wish her all of the best with everything, and hopefully, you can make this jump soon! xx

Aby from You Baby Me Mummy – I have this lady to thank for all of my knowledge when it comes to sharing my blog and driving traffic. Although I still have a long way to go, I know by following her tips I will get there! Her blog is fabulous, and to be fair, so is she. Thanks Aby xx

What is Female Entrepreneur Week?

Female Entrepreneur Week (FEW) is an online festival, celebrating female entrepreneurs everywhere. Not many women have the courage to take the leap and start their own business. FEW is giving us the opportunity to take part in some absolutely fabulous workshops to help us build our businesses, our brands, and our skills. This all begins on the 21st of June, so get yourself over there and sign up!

How can I sign up?

Easy peasy! Head over to Female Entrepreneur Week‘s website here to get yourself access to all of the free training and resources. It’s really that simple!

If you’ve got a business and you’re unsure how you can take it further, or you write a blog as a hobby and would like to turn it into a business then this is the place for you.

See you there?